Let me take you back to the Fall of 2011. My world literally came crashing down on me! My father suffered a severe stroke, my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer, and Chris took a hockey stick to the eye resulting in a career ending concussion. All the while I was raising 3 young children.
We all know the quote “God never gives you more than you can handle”, but at that point I was broken and crumbling to my knees on the bathroom floor (oh and why ladies do we always go to our bathroom floors?) I sobbed to God this was enough I can’t take anymore! I have always been pretty darn strong, I like to think my 2 older brothers put me through hell growing up to prepare myself for my loving, but not easy to handle husband. They used to always say, “don’t be so sensitive” or “grow thicker skin,” well, on that bathroom floor I put on my big girl pants and strapped on my thick skin armor.
I dug into any book I could find and scoured the Internet for any and all ways to heal the ones I loved in my life. I was determined to find the solutions. This research led me to the world of many holistic healing methods and therapies. It was at this time that I learned about transcendental meditation to help Chris deal with his post-concussion symptoms. Here are just to list a few benefits of practicing transcendental meditation that piqued my interest…
Reduced stress and anxiety.
Greater sense of clarity and productivity.
Lower blood pressure.
Greater sense of calmness throughout the day.
Lower risk of heart attack or stroke.
Improved brain function and memory.
I started sourcing the best person for us to learn this method and encouraged Chris to start implementing transcendental meditation into his daily routine like YESTERDAY! I wanted Chris to feel all the benefits above ASAP because it was literally killing me to see my tough, strong, fearless, leader of all teams, and most importantly the leader of our family, whole again. Well in the true spirit of Lauren I needed to have patience with this situation. I needed to give Chris the time he needed to believe in and want to practice transcendental meditation. He was not open to it and that was ok – I’m a firm believer that God organically has the ultimate plan and reason for all He does. This was not the time for Chris.
However, learning about transcendental meditation was NOT a mistake. About two years after all this chaos and putting my body into overdrive I could feel the severe effects of what I put my body through without even taking a moment to check in on it. Note, life lesson I learned the importance of self-care in a big way! I went through two years while caring for my loved ones without ever checking in on myself. Looking back I never gave it a thought that I was only sleeping 3-4 hours a night worrying about everyone, working out on little sleep because of the idea I had to stay a size 4, forgetting to eat 3 meals a day because I was rushing to feed the kids (and the crust from a grilled cheese isn’t going to cut it for dinner).
Fast forward three years later where I found myself back on the bathroom floor crying. Yes, I lost my Dad and that was a lot of tears, but my mom was healthy and cancer free and Chris was on the up and up thriving, and there I was exhausted and unhealthy. I didn’t even realize it! What happened? I demanded so much from my little body for three years on overdrive.
I learned during that season of my life that if I’m not whole and healthy I’m no good for anyone and most importantly for my family. Once again I had to dig deep, put on my big girl pants and grow some thick skin to care for myself this time!
It started with that therapy that I was certain was going to heal Chris years prior. I dug out that number and information for transcendental meditation and I signed up for the rigorous training. It was the best decision of my life! I am forever grateful to my teacher. All the benefits that I thought Chris needed to heal were actually what I needed to heal. I practice two times a day for 20 minutes with my personal and sacred mantra. I prefer to practice in the morning when the house is quiet, no kids, no husband, and no dogs and then again prior to dinner. It’s not weird in the sense that I don’t sit in a funny yoga pose or chant. In fact, if you passed me meditating in my car during the carpool line you wouldn’t even know. To this day it is my greatest tool in my back pocket when life comes crashing at my door. Oh I’ve got it, bring it on!